Meaning of Meaning.

After a long tiring day at work… in one of those dull-momentary-lapse-of-energy-I-cannot-work-anymore-Lemmegoyoualldickheads-phewwww moments I looked at R and A who sit behind me and genereally mused “Do you guys think there is any meaning in what we are doing? Do you think there is any meaning to our lives?” with all the existensial angst I could possibly muster.

R, drowning in a days work of factor analysis, regression co-efficients and multivariate correlations, staring at the screen with unblinking red eyes, had not even registered what I said,when her tongue shot out ” Meaning? What is that? What is the meaning of meaning?”

Lol.

She didnt see the irony in that statement. Poor R. I think she is dying.

Disaster

And the drinking and dancing did not happen

Fell sick on the d-day…spent a small fortune to just go to the mall some half-a-country across and all I did was to buy tablets from the pharmacy there and puke in the small cramped loo and head back home.

grumpy…grrr grrr….

but well….there is always the next weekend….

sunday morning blues

ho hum..
dum dum…
sunday morning work
can suck.
i dont wanta be in office
can i go home and sleep please.
blues leading to a bad verse
thats ginger’s sunday curse.
ho hum..
dum dum

Damn!

Back home – my most worrisome thoughts with the weekend approaching was – Where the hell will the party be this Friday, what do they serve and what do I wear and which friend do I go with?

Now away from home in an alien country which has this strange concept of working on Sundays, where I have to my own laundry and my own cooking the biggest question that looms in front of me every – Is there milk in the fridge for tea in the morning and is there anything to wear on Friday evening and is there anyone to meet?

Damn! I feel like I am turning into an old spinster woman with 17 cats who sleeps with a hot water bottle and her favorite pastime is washing and drying her clothes 6 times a day.

I wanta sleeeeeppp

every 10 minutes I am falling off my chair ….nodding off to sleep….

I cannot pretend to work any more………..aaaaaaa

I wanta sleeeepppppp.

Weekend Work

Working on Weekends is bad for health.

I am severly ill

Wrong side of the bed.

1: Today, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

2: At least you had a right side. All sides of my bed are wrong.

3: Shaddup you both. At least you both woke up. I am still asleep. That too on one of the wrong sides. Dont know and dont care which one.

4: You guys are lucky. Only wrong sides. I woke up in the wrong bed.

Crap again.

I have been told that I am rude.

Sigh.

My self esteem has taken a huge dip and am now lying dunked in a tub of ice cream.

Dont read this crappy post.

Just bought a Laptop. My first one. Only for watching movies, listening to music and surfing on weekends.

Been on a movie marathon for the last few days/.

About Schmidt – Friday
Dead Man walking – Saturday (during which I fell asleep within ten minutes of the start of the movie)
Little Miss Sunshine – Monday
Devil wears Prada – Tuesday.

I am only typing this because its 1.00 p.m here and I am trying to keep awake and concentrate on the excel sheet I am supposed to be working on and am unable to because my head keeps nodding off.

Maybe I should not do this movie-watching-every-night routine.

Are you wondering what the hell am I trying to say? I had warned you, dont read this crappy post. Its pretty pointless.

Whiners

The whiners.

I cant stand them.
They get on my bleedy nerves.
Make me feel, like I have only one nerve left and they are dancing on it.

Uff…. I know this is not going to happen!
Oh god, what do I do?
Oh ma…… oh goddd..ohh noooo,

Eeee aaa oooo..

I feel like shouting “FUCK YOU!!!!”

They are tired, bored, jaded, uninterested, sleepy, drained, worn-out, exhausted all the time.
Nothing is interesting, exciting, motivating, appealing, remarkable.
Everything is hmmm….all right, same old shit.

Obviously life sucks for you! Coz YOU ARE SUCKING IT BACK!!!!

I cant even tell them “Go fly a goddamn kite!” coz they will probably come back and whine about how the kite didn’t fly because the wind wasn’t right and the paper wasn’t too good and the thread stung their palms.

Whiners !!!!!

Rain Rain come again.

S just told me its raining like kutra and manzar in Mumbai.

What am I doing sitting on sands?

Fukitol

There are those who trip on Rolled Leaves
A few who drown themselves in Alcohol
and some turn a dozen Cigarettes to ash,
While I go and just pop in a new Fukitol

Phew

Now
Run!
Hurry!!
Quick!!!
Urgent!!!
Right now!!!!
Triiiiinnnnngggg!!!!
Please take this up. (WTF!!!!!)
We HAVE to do this right away!(Yeah!!!!!!)

Phew.

Sunday Bloody Sunday.

Ho hummm dum dum.
I hate working on Sundays.

I want to right now stand by the sea and shout at the top of my voice.
And when I am exhausted with the shouting, have a rocking cup of hottt tea and then lie down on the sand and sleep.

Under the stars.

Ho hummm dum dum.

June is not June…

Woke up this June morning to a scalding sun burning down on the desert city. The fire from the sky reflected off shiny fibre glass surfaces of the buildings all around, the heat waves rising above the tops of shiny expensive cars zooming around me and the excessive need to wear sun glasses without which you cannot manage to look out of the window, the heat being reflected off manicured sidewalks brought back a sudden sharp pain.

A desperate longing to feel the excitement of the first rains.
A wish for the warm fuzzy feeling of having special cutting chai on the roadside tapri (the one with the blue traupalin cover propped on top of the chai-wala) while the drizzle gets steadily stronger
A need to crib about the traffic, the pot holes, the dirt, the sloth, the spilling garbage, the wet crowds in the trains, the never resolving traffic.
The stopping by to only stare at the beauty of the wild grey sea on marine drive.
The quiet wordless walks on worli sea-face on beautiful rainy mornings, evenings and nights.
A quiet breakfast at Tea Center and then walking on the wide expanse outside NCPA.
Standing and staring at Cuffe Parade and imagining where the Shantaram slums would be.
Stepping out of the car only to feel the rain drops on my skin.
The fun of sharing an ice-cream in the car while water pounds on the car top and we sit with wet feet and socks.
The smells of the city in the rain. The drenched trees drooping under the weight of the water. The sea wafting over with the breeze.

Everything.

June is not June without that rainswept sea and those brooding skies.

And reached work to first log onto the net only to read this. Beautifully beautifully beautifully written!! Thanks t. Thanks for putting me into words so impeccably.

blah blah blah

i am fed up with msword.
msword is screwing my life.
bloody fonts. bloody tables. bloody font sizing.bloody capitals.
if i could write like this i would write like this.

&%^*#$ @& right now big time by blah blah blah..the formatting is not right..blah blah blah.

grrrrr

Affliction

Cold and Cough. Goes away on it’s own. In seven days.
Wish that was the only affliction I had.

Hmph

I want to go to Goa.

I WANT TO GO TO GOA.

And I want it to be January.

Now. Now. Now.

Hmph.

III – Overworked

sniff…sniff…..

I am looking like this in my mind right now….
(only imagine this hanging guy with a cold and a sore throat)

II – My life and my life

Ok people….another long long post from me…only because I have no work in life.
nothing much to do….sorry let me correct that. NOTHING to do.

right now I am listening to bye bye miss american pie..dum dum.

since the last three weeks here I have.
- visited Jumeriah beach six times.
- visited irish village twice.
- had wine once.
- cooked dinner for myself twice.
- went grocery shopping eleven times
- cursed this city 459759 times
- missed mumbai 5865489569579 times.
- had onion soup thrice
- checked out handsome lebanese boys 18 times
- played squash once
- taken walks on the creek 5 times
- had maggi noodles zero times
- met R and D once.
- sent non-sensical mails 6574 times
- taken the boat ride twice.
- changed my gmail message 12 times.
- spent 65 hours waiting for a taxi.
- wondered what am I doing in life 8 times
- got salary 0.5 times.
- read non sense on wikipedia 78 times
- logged in and out of gmail 59675969576750 times.
- heard baker street 45 times

interesting life eh?

Ok..it wasnt that long…coz dont have much to say …
tata..now going back to doing nothing.

(Thats how I look in my mind these days )

I – Bad Day is here again

All Right. I am succumbing to the grunge feeling. About everyday.
I have to crib. Crib about the day. About the morning.

(Thats how I feel today in my mind. To others I am looking awesome as usual)

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. Woke up with a head ache. Opened the refrigerator, only to realize that the milk bottle in the fridge was open. Milk had spilt on the shelf everywhere. While I was mopping that I forgot I had kept tea for boiling on the gas. So that exploded and spilt all over the burner.
All this meant..no time for breakfast.
Then the taxi we had ordered …never turned up. Apparently, he had some accident yesterday.
And today is Sunday. And I am working. And its only 10.30 a.m. yet. Makes me want to skip the rest of today and directly move to tomorrow.
Phew
I just wanta go home and sleep.
and when I say home
I mean Andheri (w), Mumbai 53, India.

Foooooooooooo. I feel much better now.